Last month, I met with a potential client who had this grand vision but wanted us to handle the entire project for free. He’s genuinely well-intentioned—and certainly has the resources—but his whole approach was backwards. “I need volunteers to make this work,” he kept insisting. I had to push back, gently but firmly: “Listen, you don’t want people tackling this as volunteers. If you really want this thing to succeed, you’ve got to treat it like the serious endeavor it is.”
By the time we finished our meal, he was asking for a real commercial proposal. That shift didn’t happen because I was trying to make a sale. It happened because I listened—really listened—to what he was trying to accomplish and helped him see there was a much better path forward.
This whole interaction crystallized something I’ve believed for four decades: Building a business isn’t about pushing your own agenda. It’s about finding that sweet spot where what clients genuinely need, what they expect and what you can realistically deliver all come together.
The Art of the Nugget Hunt
When I think about how APCO grew from just me working alone to this global firm we are today, I keep coming back to what I call “nuggets”—those small pieces of insight that reveal much bigger opportunities. Every single conversation holds them, but only if you’re actually listening carefully enough.
Here’s what I’ve figured out: Clients rarely come right out and tell you about their real challenges. Instead, they’ll mention in passing that they “had some trouble when we tried to do X last year.” That’s your golden moment. I’ll lean in and say something like, “Oh, you know what? We’ve had several clients face that exact same challenge. Here’s how we approached it with them. Would something along those lines be helpful for you?”
But you need to show clients that you’re truly invested in understanding their unique situation, not just trying to sell them some cookie-cutter solution you’ve got sitting on the shelf.
I actually lost a major pitch recently. Instead of just moving on to the next thing, I called up the decision-maker and asked for honest feedback. During that conversation, I happened to mention our AI solutions almost casually. Now she wants a full presentation. Sometimes your best business opportunities actually come from conversations about why you didn’t get the business in the first place.
Choosing Your Battles
People ask me all the time how I decide which opportunities are worth pursuing. I always go for the low-hanging fruit first—those opportunities where we already have solid proof of concept and can deliver some early wins.
When clients come to me wanting something that seems like it’s going to be a heavy lift, I break it down into manageable pieces. “Here’s what we can definitely do first,” I’ll suggest. “Let’s start with this initial phase, see what we learn together, then decide whether it makes sense to continue.” It’s my way of never really accepting no for an answer—there’s always a yes hiding somewhere inside the no.
The Currency of Relationships
Here’s something most business books will never tell you: The real secret to sustainable growth is remembering that business is fundamentally personal. Just last week, I was on a call with a client whose family originally came from Cuba. My mother was actually raised there. We ended up swapping stories about our mothers’ arroz con pollo recipes.
“Relationships really are the heart of everything we do. It’s not just about getting the job done—it’s about showing you genuinely care, that you listen and that you want your clients to actually succeed.”
This isn’t just small talk or surface-level networking. This is real relationship building. When you remember someone’s birthday, ask about their kids or share something meaningful about yourself, you’re essentially saying, “I see you as a complete person, not just a business opportunity walking around.”
That personal connection becomes your real differentiator. We’ve had clients face serious budget cuts where every single consultant was suddenly on the chopping block. APCO consistently survived those cuts. Why? Because when clients had to evaluate where they were getting genuine value—where consultants were acting more like trusted advisors than just vendors—we consistently made their essential list.
Looking Ahead
I think about things differently than I did when I was 50. But one fundamental thing hasn’t changed: Great business building comes from anticipating what clients need before they can even articulate it themselves.
Sometimes that means having genuinely difficult conversations. Last week, a CEO called me about this sensitive employee survey that her investors were pressuring her to skip. After our strategy session, I called her back privately. “I need you to understand what the personal stakes really are here,” I told her. That’s what trusted advisors do—they share hard truths privately while still supporting their clients publicly.
The businesses that truly endure aren’t built on simple transactions. They’re built on relationships where clients know you’ll genuinely hear them, challenge them respectfully when necessary, and support them even when you fundamentally disagree.
Because here’s what I’ve discovered after all these years: Every “no” contains a “yes” that’s just waiting to be uncovered. Every challenge holds a real opportunity. And every single client interaction is a chance to build something that matters—not just for business, but for the real people whose lives our work genuinely touches.
That’s how you build something that lasts.
